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Three Essential Expat Survival Tools

1/23/2014

13 Comments

 
Contrary to popular belief, living abroad doesn’t require you to be wealthy, retired, or willing to spend years restoring a crumbling farmhouse with the help of semi-literate but wise and amusing locals. But if you do choose to become an expat, there are three things you will need to survive the general upheaval of the move and the inevitable social and linguistic pratfalls you’ll be taking in your new home. 
PictureA belly laugh a day keeps the expat blues away.
1. A sense of humor. Every foreign language is studded with little trip wires, such as the Spanish word embarazada, which sounds so much like the English “embarrassed,” but in fact means “pregnant,” creating endless opportunities for misunderstandings and faux pas. Or there’s the common word huevos, literally “eggs” but often used as a slang word for testicles. You’ll want to be careful not to ask the guy at the farmers’ market whether he has huevos; he’ll inevitably reply “Yes, two big ones,” and everyone within earshot will snicker until you flee in confusion and find someplace else to buy your breakfast groceries. If you can laugh about it later, you'll find it's the best antidote to the mortification of the moment.

2. An adaptable attitude.  Life simply works differently elsewhere, and I can tell you from personal experience that it's rarely helpful to exclaim, “But that’s not the way they do things in Cleveland!” Americans who visit Seville often attempt to maintain their usual hours, eating breakfast while everyone else is still sleeping, trying to go shopping and sightseeing before anything opens, eating lunch at noon and dinner at seven – hours when no Sevillano would dream of taking a meal – and retiring for the night just as everyone else is heading out for before-dinner drinks. Such visitors usually leave town wondering why everyone says Seville is so jolly, when they found it rather dull.

Karen McCann, Romanian farmwoman at train stationRomanian farmwoman at train station
Adapting to some new customs – such as wine with lunch followed by a siesta – is delightfully easy. Others, such as spending an hour and a half on a train in which everyone is chain smoking, can be a bit more challenging. When this happened to me in rural Romania, I glanced around at my companions – tough country women and large, sinister-looking fellows in battered fedoras – and felt this was not the moment to enter into a debate about the health hazards of tobacco, the railroad’s clearly posted anti-smoking policy, or my personal breathing preferences. Even if my Romanian had been equal to such a conversation, I wasn’t entirely convinced it would have been in my best interests, as the pungent tobacco smoke provided a welcome counterpoint to the eye-watering scent of unwashed bodies.

Karen McCann, mother and child in Seville churchPalabrotas can happen anywhere.
3. Respect for other cultures. My friend Fiona just wrote a wonderful post on her Scribbler in Seville blog: Five things Spanish people say a lot (and what they mean). I especially loved the part describing how Sevillanos use profanity, which they call palabrotas (literally “big, ugly words”). I’ve often heard sweet old ladies and nice young parents addressing their toddlers using hair-raising palabrotas, words that in America would have passersby calling Child Protective Services or staging an intervention. But I have learned that in Spanish society, such language isn’t shockingly inappropriate but rather is used casually to underscore intimacy and affection. I’m just glad that, as a foreigner, I’m not expected to use those words, as I can never keep straight their degree of shock value, and have once or twice hideously overstepped the mark by mistake.

Maintaining your sense of humor, an adaptable attitude, and respect for other cultures will help you navigate a wide range of situations when you’re in unfamiliar territory. In her post, Fiona captures the richness and sheer lunacy of living in a world where beer isn’t alcohol, ham isn’t meat, and everyone’s mother makes the best gazpacho ever. And isn’t that really why we travel and live abroad – to be able to view the world through different eyes? 

Karen McCann's Dancing in the Fountain: How to Enjoy Living Abroad
Want more about the joys, challenges, and outright lunacy of expat life? Check out my book Dancing in the Fountain: How to Enjoy Living Abroad. "I loved this book," wrote Lonely Planet. "I must have laughed aloud at least once in every chapter ... The advice in the book is terrific." Available from Amazon and e-book retailers worldwide.

13 Comments
Jackie Hinton
1/23/2014 08:54:48 am

How I love reading these essays. They bring a sense of longing for Seville - a very memorable and happy three years of my life. Karen, what you see and express with humor is priceless and brings it all alive and back to mind. Thank you. Love, Jackie

Reply
Karen McCann
1/24/2014 05:39:26 pm

Thanks, Jackie! Seville is such a zany place to live – as you well know! Glad you're enjoying revisiting my favorite city in these posts.

Reply
Steve
1/23/2014 10:20:04 am

Love your blog Karen. One of the "ex-pat" things we are continually do a shuffle dance with is the bureaucracy, residency procedures, with different rules and regulations, etc. Not easy. Over the past month, I have received in the mail 2 tickets for going through red lights (which everybody does here, trust me), and now am in danger of losing my driver's license. I am not saying that driving through a red light is different anywhere, but it seems there must be a campaign in place now and they are tightening up. News to me. The tickets I received were from August and yesterday, September! I don't stand a chance! I will be on foot for sure.

Reply
Karen McCann
1/24/2014 05:43:03 pm

I know what you mean about driving through red lights, Steve. In my neighborhood, people are always driving and parking on the sidewalks. The shocking thing about your story is that they actually issued you tickets – and only 4 or 5 months after the "crime!" Thanks for reminding me why I never drive in Seville!

Reply
carolyn heinz
1/23/2014 10:41:04 am

While beer may not alcohol it can still leave me staggering home for the siesta for sure.

Reply
Karen McCann
1/24/2014 05:43:52 pm

Me too. Yet another reason I'm glad I never drive when I'm in Seville!

Reply
Tita Ashton link
1/23/2014 12:32:46 pm

All around Spain you'll find hilarious translations - big Spanish favourites - callos madrileños was translated as Corns of Madrileños, jamon serrano - highland ham - Rape a la americana - rape American style. There are lots more so watch those menus, you'll crack up laughing. If you want to know what they are callos is tripe and rape is fish.

Reply
Karen McCann
1/24/2014 05:48:56 pm

You're so right, Tita. The menus are very funny and often bizarre. The other day I saw judías con jamón (green beans with ham) translated as "Jews with ham" ... a very inappropriate translation indeed!

Reply
Ryan from Jets Like Taxis link
1/23/2014 02:09:16 pm

I couldn't agree more! All of these things are essential for leading a much more relaxing and happy life as an expat.

Speaking of vocab...One cannot do anything but laugh at how people here in Mexico look at me crazy when I say a word that's exclusive to Spain. And I'm sure we'll have the exact same thing, but backwards, when we get back to Spain. That's just how it is!

Reply
Karen McCann
1/24/2014 05:50:39 pm

Ryan, I run into the same confusion at times here in California, where Latin American Spanish rules. I usually fall back on Spanglish, or even a sublanguage I call "charades-lish." Whatever works!

Reply
Ryan from Jets Like Taxis link
1/24/2014 08:14:48 pm

Haha I know that one from Montenegro! We do speak some, but definitely not enough.

Louise McStravick link
1/23/2014 03:01:54 pm

So true! I am living with my partner in Turkey and he still insists on queueing! No! Turkish people don't know what queueing is! When in Turkey!

Reply
Karen McCann
1/24/2014 05:53:34 pm

It's hard to break the habits of a lifetime. For instance, in Spain, I had to train myself to look both ways crossing any road, even a one-way street or pedestrian alley; you just never know who or what is going to be coming at you from any direction. But that's what makes it interesting!

Reply



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